The Unwanted Guest
by MorbidPet17
Summary: Amanda gets an unwanted visit at the station. Fin is out of town. She needs backup but does she trust Nick enough to ask for it?
1. Chapter 1

**So I'm back for a 2nd attempt at this. Again I have to let you know english isn't my first language. I got some constructive feedback on my last fanfic which was much appreciated and I'm hoping I'm doing a few things different this time around that makes it an easier read. I don't own any of the characters unfortunately.**  
**Anywho this one's about Amanda and Nick. I have to tell you though I'm a Fin/Amanda shipper at heart but ****I can't see Warren & TPTB going there though unfortunately. I think Amanda and Nick might be a possibilty even if I fear the chemistry isn't really there. The thought of them being able to pull of a Debra/Quinn relationship a la Dexter intrigues me a bit though I have to admit.**  
**But on to my story. I guess we're about somewhere at the beginning of season 14. Nick's divorced. It takes place during one single day. It's Nick having Amanda's back since Fin is AWOL. And as you've guessed from the title there's a guest coming and he's not so wanted there. Happy reading!**

**XXX**

"Hey Rollins," came from the gate and she immediately raised her head from the papers that previously had her attention. She spotted the uniform that had called her name and then as her eyes wandered to the figure behind him it was like a fist hit her gut. She quickly looked back down. She knew she had to take control of her body and mind as fast as possible cause otherwise the uniform would bring the unwanted guest inside the squad room and that's the last thing she wanted.  
"Hey Rollins, you have a visitor," the uniform called out again. She managed to look back up again, sweeping past Nick's curious eyes across the desk as she did. She swallowed hard and got up from her desk feeling Nick's eyes still on her. She felt relief that her legs carried her as she took that first step towards the gate. She had to gather all strength in her body to hold herself upright and composed.

"He says he's an old colleague," the uniform said as she got closer and he hinted to the figure right behind him. Amanda nodded and managed a weak "Thanks". The uniform looked at her a bit pensive but still turned around and left the two alone. Amanda couldn't even look at the man that she was now left with. She took a few steps out into the hallway where there was a little more space and any curious eyes from her squad wouldn't reach them.

"Hi," he said and she felt her entire body tense up even more by the sound of his voice. Something that felt like motion sickness came crawling up her throat and she swallowed hard. Still not able to look at the man in front of her she looked down the hallway and followed a man and a woman on their way to the elevator. She felt like running after them as they disappeared into the elevator.  
"I'm sorry to just show up like this but I didn't have your number," he said after some awkward silence. She bit her lip and managed to just briefly look at him. He looked just as she remembered him, the face that still to this day showed up in her nightmares from time to time. The unreliable half smile and those dark eyes that made her skin crawl.

"What do you want?" she asked quickly as she looked away again. This time she didn't find anyone in the hallway to look at so she ended up just staring at a tiny crack in the wall to the right of this despicable man. She'd like to make a crack in him she thought if that didn't mean she had to touch him.  
"I'm in town for this seminar. I arrived yesterday. Well your mom found out from my mom, you know, and she asked me to bring some stuff for you," he sounded a bit unsecure. Not a trait he usually sported.  
"Okay. Where is it?" she felt forced to look at him again. She managed to keep her eyes on him even though she felt like she was dying a little inside with every single second that went by.  
"Well it's a package. It's back at my hotel."  
"Why did you come here without it?" she asked with a frown on her face. He looked as though he had to think about it.  
"Well I was here yesterday but I'd just missed you then. I wasn't sure I'd found you today either," he tried to look sincere but she didn't buy that explanation at all and surely the next thing that came out of his mouth proved her right.  
"You could come by my hotel. I'll be there the rest of the night. The end of the seminar and then a dinner for the participants," he picked up a card from his jacket pocket and held it out for her.  
"It's the Courtyard Marriott. Just across Central Park." She shook her head and looked away.  
"Mandy common. It will be quick." She winced when she heard him say her name. Or rather her Atlanta PD nickname.  
"Well I'm not sure how the day will play out," she sighed and then clenched her jaws to keep the sickness down that was now threatening to climb up her throat again.  
"Common. We both know the NYPD have meal breaks too. I wouldn't be here if your mom hadn't sent me that package for you. She'll ask questions if you don't get it," he held out the card even further to her and she felt like backing up but she didn't. She knew he was right and it annoyed her. She didn't speak to her mom often but she knew she would find a way to turn that into some sort of rejection if she didn't accept that package. Amanda quickly reached for the card and ripped it out of his hand.  
"My number's on the back. I'm leaving for the airport at eight am tomorrow morning but you can come by during the night if you get busy here," he said while putting his hands down his jacket pockets.  
"That won't be necessary. Just leave it at the front desk if I don't show up," she said through her clenched jaws feeling violated just by him suggesting she would visit his hotel room during the night.  
"Common Mandy. There's no hidden agenda. It's just a package from your mom," he said calmly as he shrugged his shoulders. She met his eyes just before he turned to leave. She kept her eyes on his back as he walked down the hallway but then turned her head so she wouldn't have to meet his eyes if he turned back and looked at her. She kept looking at him through the corner of her eye though, wanting to make sure he left. She knew she wouldn't be able to calm down for a while but just having him out of the building would make it easier for her to breath at least. She saw the elevator doors open and he stepped in. He turned around and she averted her eyes until the elevator doors were shut. She took a deep breath and felt a sob slip up her throat. She cleared her throat to hide it in case someone around had heard her. No one seemed to have noticed though. She slipped down the hotel card in her back jeans pocket and went back into the squad room.

"Who was that?" Nick asked as she sat down opposite him. When she looked up at him it looked as though she hadn't heard him and he raised his eyebrows.  
"What?" she asked once she realized he was looking at her.  
"I asked; who was that?" he repeated and put down the file he held on to on the desk as he focused his attention on her and her somewhat odd behavior.  
"Oh, no one," she answered quickly as she looked back over her shoulder to Fin's empty desk. Typically, she thought, that her partner had to be away right now. It wasn't that she begrudged that he had a couple of days off. He rarely took time off but his son had asked him if he wanted to come along and meet Alejandro's, his fiancées, parents who was living in Washington. She knew that Ken asking Fin to come along was a big deal to her partner and she was happy that he'd accepted the invitation. It was just typical that it had to be right now. Fin had the ability to empower her just by his presence and she felt in need of that right now. She suddenly felt very queasy and stood up quickly to make her way to the ladies room. Neither her look at Fin's desk or the sudden paleness before she rushed down the hall went unnoticed by Nick.

Even though she couldn't shake of the earlier encounter the day went on. They soon got a case and while Olivia and Nick took the crime scene Amanda went with Munch to do some door knocking in the neighborhood in hope of finding some witnesses to the rape and murder of a young woman. They didn't find anyone though and on a regular day Amanda would feel apprehensive by this but today she had a hard time focusing so she saw it as a blessing to just be doing manual footwork. And Munch was good at keeping her distracted while trailing along the neighborhood. Only Munches' wit worked on a day like today. Luckily Olivia and Nick had better luck at the crime scene and found both fingerprints and DNA. They were hopeful to catch whoever had decided he could play God.

Amanda soon found herself back at the station setting up a board for the case. Liv and Nick went by Warner in the morgue meanwhile and Munch got in contact with the police in Ohio where the young woman's family lived. They all soon gathered around the board along with Cragen and Amanda got the suspect up on the screen as they made a DNA hit. The suspect worked at the same gym as the woman they soon found out. Cragen sent Olivia and Munch to the gym that was located near Lincoln square while he wanted Amanda and Nick to take the suspects apartment up in East Harlem. Both teams would have police backup waiting for them. Amanda, now finding her way around the city a little better after nearly a year here, knew East Harlem meant her unwanted guest's hotel would be on their way. Of course they had to go straight there and she kept hoping they would find the guy at home so she'd be occupied with the case. Luck wasn't on her side this day though as she'd already figured. Even before they got to the guys apartment Olivia phoned in and informed them that they'd made the arrest at the gym. She told them to search his apartment anyway as they were almost there anyway. Olivia and Munch would take the interview with the suspect meanwhile. They searched the place rather quickly. They found photos of the man and the murdered woman which hinted to the fact they had been more than just colleagues. They decided to drive back into the station and Nick got behind the wheel. He hadn't picked up on any more odd behavior since the running pale to the bathroom business earlier today but now in the car he felt the tension build up around her. No one said anything. He kept looking at her out of the corner of his eye. She were doing the same at him as she was wondering if she would be able to ask him or not. If it were Fin it wouldn't be a problem but she wasn't sure about Nick. They really hadn't built up any kind of trust between them, not that she didn't feel safe with him as backup it was more that they butt heads on cases often. Sure they had one or two tequila races during the year and she'd probably turn to him before she turned to Olivia but she was just worried about the questions he might have if she asked him for a detour. He was rather nosy in her opinion. But she really didn't feel like going to the hotel on her own later one either. The clock had already passed seven thirty and she realized it was now or never.

"Do you mind taking a detour?" she asked quickly before she changed her mind. He looked over at her.  
"No. Where to?" He said as soon as he had a look at her and saw the strain on her face. The favor hadn't been easy for her to enquire. She fished up a card from her back pocket and she had a look at it.  
"It's a hotel. Courtyard Marriott," she told him.  
"That's upper east right?" he asked and she said yes after taking another look at the card.  
"No problem. Who's there?" he already were asking questions she thought to herself and took a deep breath.  
"No one. I'm just picking up a package," she told him and looked out her window. Nick knew not to pry more and focused back on the road. The traffic was rather bad so a stop by the hotel which was nearby wouldn't be such a bad idea, hopefully it would have slowed down once they got back on the road again. He drove into the hotels parking lot just minutes later. He turned the engine off and relaxed back in his seat. Amanda's side were closer to the hotel and she kept staring out the window to the foyer. She wasn't moving.

"Can I go with you?" he asked. She kept her head still for another few seconds but then she turned to look at him. She looked a little bit lost, like she couldn't make up her mind about his question.  
"I've heard they have a swimming pool in the lobby, or at least so you can see it from the lobby," he said to give her a reason for him to join her. She still hesitated a bit but then finally she nodded. She didn't move though so he open his door to get her going. He got all the way out and around the car before she'd even open her door though. He had no idea what was going on with her and it puzzled him to see her like this. She was usually so headstrong and secure and he had rarely seen her unbalanced. But right now she was. Unbalanced to say the least. Once she'd closed the door he locked the car behind them and he took the lead up the hotel. He held up the door for her and then waited back as she went up to the front desk. A lady greeted her with a big smile and he tried to listen in but a couple of older ladies in the foyer were talking so loudly it made it impossible for him to eavesdrop. Amanda soon turned from the desk and hinted with her head for him to follow her further in. He followed her a couple of steps behind and took a door from her. He remained there though when he saw the big company who was in there. About a hundred heads he estimated, mostly men. Gathered around two long tables having dinner. Nothing fanzy, mostly casual dressed some with ties though. Amanda felt reluctant to walk further in but finally did. Nick watched her walk up along the first table as she seemed to look for someone. He spotted a man rising from the 2nd table, she stopped immediately and waited for him to walk up to her. He recognized the man. It was the same man that had visited her earlier at the station. They didn't greet each other with a handshake or anything. He saw them exchange some words and then Amanda turned. Her face was anything but friendly. The man followed her and they walked past Nick. Nick met the man's eyes as he passed him. There was something fishy about him, or maybe it was just that this whole situation felt fishy Nick thought to himself. Amanda let the man pass and then waited a few steps before she followed. Nick let go off the door but was unsure whether he should follow or not. But as Amanda turned and made big eyes as he waved him forward he got that she wanted him to follow and he quickly caught up to her. The man had pushed the elevator button and the doors immediately went up. He stepped in and Amanda and then Nick followed. Awkwardly Amanda stepped to the other side of the car from where the man stood which left Nick in the middle of the two. The man looked at Nick after he'd pushed a button and the doors went shut.

"This is Nick, my partner," Amanda said picking up on the awkwardness. Nick held out his hand and the man took it.  
"Shane," the man said and even with the short name the southern accent were distinct. Nick nodded at him as they shook hands. He had a firm grip and his skin felt rough against Nicks palm. They were riding almost all the way up and Nick checked out the man out of the corner of his eye. They were about the same height but Shane had some more weight on him. His hair had a clean cut with shaved sides and back. The top hair giving away his hair was brown. His skin was slightly tanned, like he spent some time in the sun recently. But then again Atlanta, if that's where he was from, had more sun than they had up here. Nick had always wondered how come Amanda's skin were so light coming from such a sunny state. Then again he didn't know much about the Georgia weather so maybe he was fooled by the latitude and the closeness to the state of Florida. Nick's thoughts wandered back to the man they were in the elevator with. He had a shaved face and Nick noticed an inch long scar on his neck. He was casually dressed in jeans and a dark blue sweater over a white shirt. During the walk Nick had spotted the boots he had on. An attribute he shared with Amanda. Nick looked over at her. She was leaning at the car wall and had her eyes down and away. Nick were getting more and more curious about this whole situation he'd been put in.

They finally reached their destination, Nick counting his blessings. Shane stepped out first and led them down a long corridor to the left. Amanda kept a few steps behind and Nick took her flank. So they were at a hotel picking up a package from a man named Shane. A man with fishy eyes but otherwise looking clean cut now leading them to what was most probably his room. With Amanda oozing hostility but also being very mysterious it wasn't a situation Nick felt comfortable in. But he had invited himself in and he under no circumstances wanted Amanda to be on her own right now, even though she had a gun or perhaps cause she had a gun. Shane stopped by a door, swiped his card and held the door open for Amanda. She took it reluctantly and then Shane went down a corridor to a lit room. She hesitated by the door and then turned to Nick and gave him a serious stare.

"Can you keep it open?" she asked with a lowered voice and he nodded. She collected herself in a few seconds and then walked down the corridor. Shane had disappeared around the corner and were out of their sight. Nick kept an eye at Amanda's back. She seemed almost scared as she looked around the corner but then took a few more steps inside before she turned her body towards the room. She stopped in the corner where Nick could see her and he noticed she looked at him too to make sure she had him in eyesight. She was clearly uncomfortable being in this man's room. He could hear Shane's voice but it was subdued so he couldn't make out what he was saying to her. Amanda didn't seem to take part of the conversation though. She just stood there looking bothered, like she couldn't wait to get out of there. A few minutes went by. Nick didn't want to stare but at the same time felt a need to keep an eye on her. He'd looked down the corridor when she finally said something and all he could make out was "will you" and "package". Nick heard Shane again but still couldn't make out what he was saying. Nick looked at Amanda. There was something about her demeanor. She almost looked as though she was shrinking. She looked so fragile and scared Nick seriously started to worry she would fall to the floor soon if she didn't get out of there.

"Rollins we need to head back to the station," he said loudly so Shane would hear him too. That seemed to snap Amanda out of some lethargy and she held out her hand as though she begged for something. A package, about 10 by 15 inches wide, were handed to Amanda and as soon as she got it in her hands she headed out of there.

"Mandy?" Nick heard Shane cry out. He let Amanda pass him and she started to walk quickly down the corridor. Nick let go of the door as he saw Shane re-emerge in the hallway. He looked a bit annoyed and when he spotted Nick a flare of anger came over his face. Nick hurried after Amanda. She'd gotten the elevator doors open by the time he got there and he got in the car right after her. He saw her press the lobby button several times, only stopping once the door were closed behind them.

"You okay?" he asked concerned. The nod he got as response came to quickly and wasn't that believable as she clung to the package in her arms. He were completely perplexed. The ride down seemed faster than when they went up and Amanda hurried out of the car as soon as the doors flew open.

"Welcome back to Courtyard Marriott," the lady behind the desk sung out with a big smile on her face as Amanda rushed by. The lady's smile jaded quickly but picked up a bit as Nick nodded at her with a slight smile when he passed by. Nick clicked the car open so Amanda could get in as soon as she reached the car which was way before Nick got there. She shut the door quickly behind her and had buckled in before he got to the car. He got in, put the keys in the engine but then turned to her before he turned the keys. She'd put the package in her lap and her hands rested on top of it.

"What's going on Amanda?" he had to ask.  
"Can we just drive?" she asked. He was trying to figure out what to say when she added; "I'm sorry it took longer than I thought it would."  
"That's not a problem Amanda. I'm just," she interrupted him before he could finish.  
"Can we just drive?" she repeated. "Please?" she added and looked at him for the first time since they'd left the hotel. She tried to smile at him but it didn't reach her eyes and she had to look away after just a few seconds. Now she seemed embarrassed for some reason he couldn't get his head around. He was known to be stubborn but he wasn't stupid, nor was he malicious. She was clearly not in the mood, or ready, to talk to him about whatever was going on and he didn't know her well enough to know how to help her get there. He turned the keys, got the car in gear and backed out of there.

They rode back to the station under silence. Once back she quickly disappeared inside and by the time he got up to the squad room he spotted the package on her desk but Amanda were nowhere to be found. Liv stepped out of their captain's office along with Cragen.  
"What took you so long?" Cragen asked as they approached him.  
"Traffic," he said shortly.  
"Where's Rollins?" Liv asked and Nick realized she must have rushed passed them so fast they didn't caught her coming in.  
"Desperate for the ladies room," Nick covered and smiled at the two. Cragen nodded.

"So the guy confessed. It should be an easy case for the DA. I need you to go with Olivia to pick up the victim's sister though. She apparently just moved to town and she knows the suspect too. She wants to see her sisters body and we should get at least a short statement from her." Nick nodded in agreement and Cragen headed back to his office. Nick looked over to the package on Amanda's desk and then down towards the locker rooms figuring she must have gone down there.  
"You ready?" Liv stood next to him with her jacket in hand. Nick hesitated, wanting to know Amanda was okay but not wanting to give anything away to Liv.  
"Yeah," he felt forced to answer and headed out after Liv. They would be gone for almost three hours, the sister fainting while in the morgue and needing some extra care from the detectives. They would end up taking the statement outside the morgue and then driving her home again. So it was close to eleven pm when they got back to the squad room. Nick immediately noticed that the package had been moved on Amanda's desk, now placed on the visitors chair. So she had at least been out there but he still couldn't see her. Cragen came out and Liv briefed him on the sister's statement. Their captain informed them that Amanda had taken down the board and arranged the case file for Liv to take to the DA once they had completed it.

"Where is she?" Nick asked.  
"I sent her home," Cragen informed him and then continued; "Someone came in looking for her." That immediately caught Nick's attention and he approached his captain.  
"Who was it?" he asked. Liv, who was now sitting at her desk, looked up at Nick as she caught the eagerness in his voice.  
"I'm not sure but he was fairly drunk and looked like he needed an escort," Cragen raised his eyebrow at Nick.  
"In his 40s, about my height, clean cut, southern accent?" Nick asked and Cragen nodded.  
"Sounds about right," Cragen said with a wondering look on his face.  
"When?"  
"About thirty minutes ago," Cragen estimated.  
"Is it okay if I head out too?" Nick asked but had already grabbed his jacket again.  
"If your partner doesn't object being ditched with the paperwork," Cragen said and turned sideways towards Liv.  
"Do you mind Liv?" Nick asked as Cragen walked back into his office letting the two of them work it out. Liv shook her head.

Nick went around Amanda's desk and picked up the package on the chair. Liv came up to him with quick steps as she noticed what a hurry he got in.  
"What's going on?" she asked. He should have known she would pick up on what was going on, not that Nick knew and he decided being honest were probably the right call at the moment.  
"I honestly don't know," he said.  
"Can I help?" she offered but he shook her off.  
"I'm not sure I can," he said and got a sympathetic nod from her. He headed out with the package under his arm. It wasn't heavy but he felt something roll around in there. When he got to the parking lot he was puzzled when he saw her car still in its lot. He stopped dead in his tracks and took a look around. The parking lot was still. Where the hell was she? And where was her unwanted guest?


	2. Chapter 2

He couldn't see Amanda or Shane anywhere. He walked over to his car and put the package on the driver's seat along with his jacket. He went over to Amanda's car and checked the door. It was locked and he couldn't spot anything out of place in there.  
"Amanda?" he called out into the dark but he got no answer. He tried to think of possible scenarios. She clearly didn't want to be alone with him so that's probably why she hadn't let him in her car. Especially not if he now was drunk too. Could she have taken a cab with him back to his hotel? No then she would have put him in a cab on his own and then been back to get her car. She could have taken the subway he thought. But if Shane had made his way back to the station in a drunken state he was being very persistent and was clearly not giving up until he got to talk to Amanda about whatever it was that was going on between the two. Maybe she had changed her mind and they were now talking it out somewhere? Maybe they were old lovers and Nick was just being stupid and butting in to stuff that wasn't his business? He didn't know what to think. He stood still for a minute not really thinking anything but then he shook his head. No, he trusted his gut feeling. Something was wrong. She would want to shake him off. He headed out onto the street and looked up and down. He saw no sign of them and didn't like the odds he had to find them, or rather her, out there. He turned around and went around to the back of the station. There was a car mechanic to one side behind the station and a daycare and a playground to the other side. He looked down the dark alley towards the playground and moved further down as he thought he saw something like a human form leaning against a brick wall. As he got closer he realized that it was Amanda hunched down and he hurried to get to her side.

Just as he'd thought her plan had been to ditch Shane. She just needed to get him out of the station first and that had meant a painful elevator ride down with him in a too small of a space. A ride that even though it was short had meant feeling his alcohol drenched breath come too close to her face and his hand on her arm before she could shake him off. Once down she hurried outside, crossing the parking lot quickly, not aiming for her car but for the street. Under normal circumstances he could probably outrun her but now he was drunk and she knew she could take him. She crossed the street with a car honking at her. She ran down the street hearing him call 'Mandy' after her several times. She took a left at the corner, ran up the street and then across it. Turned right and then another right, ran down two blocks and then left into the alley by the daycare that she knew would take her back to the station. She hadn't stopped once and now as the dark embraced her she finally were able to stop and take many deep breaths until she felt oxygenized again. She kept close to the brick wall checking behind her in case he would catch up to her. As she reached the station though she thought she saw a male figure out on the street and she feared he was still lingering around. She retracted back into the alley and hunched down towards the wall. She at least felt somewhat safe in the darkness.

"It's just me. It's Nick," he said as he got closer and noticed that she shied backwards as soon as she saw him coming. The lightning were bad in the alley and he couldn't read her face.  
"Are you okay?" he asked and reached out to touch her arm but she shied away again. She nodded but that didn't convince him. He'd left his arm out and he stepped closer even though he got she didn't want to. He grabbed a hold of her arm and searched down until he had her hand in his.  
"You're trembling," he whispered as he concluded with touch what he thought he picked up with his eye. She hated this. Showing him her weakness. She wasn't a damn damsel in distress. She could take care of herself. Or so she'd thought. Right now she felt like she was falling into pieces and she couldn't even retort with a snappy comment, one of those who usually had him turn away in anger and just leave her alone. She wanted to pull her hand back but she felt unable to do so. His touch made her somehow feel safe and safe was all she wanted to feel right now.

"He's not out there. Let me drive you home," Nick said and expected resistance. She remained quiet though. And still, except for the trembling that still had power over her body he felt as he kept her hand in his own. When she didn't say anything he carefully pulled at her hand to get her moving. Again he expected resistance but she didn't fight him. As they got a few steps he let her have her hand back as he felt her pull at it. He made sure she followed him though. He could tell she got wary as they got out of the alley.

"I'm right here," he said in an attempt to make her feel a bit safer. They managed to get to his car and they both got in. He handed her the box that laid on his seat and she took it from him. He tossed his jacket in the backseat and then buckled in. Amanda did the same and Nick drove out of there. She felt relieved by the tinted windows in his car but still kept an eye out for Shane as they got out on the street. He didn't know her exact address but knew it was in Williamsburg so he headed for the bridge. It was a weekday and it was late so there wasn't much traffic out on the streets. He kept throwing looks her way. She kept her head slightly to the side, gazing out the window. He could tell by the hands on the box that her trembling had stopped and he felt grateful she seemed to have calm down at least on the surface. Her hair was as usual up in a high ponytail which left her neck and ear exposed. Nick found himself admiring her light, flawless skin. The streetlights making her skin look even more like translucent alabaster and her hair glistering with every passing light. Her neck looked inviting and he couldn't help but smile as his eye landed on her ear. Those ears of hers. Perfectly shaped and whenever her hair was out they seemed to have a habit of peeking through. He silently adored that. He couldn't remember a time when he'd ever admired a woman's ears before. He was truly loosing it he thought and took a deep breath to focus back on reality. The reality was she was his co-worker, partner, the one he'd supposed to keep safe and the other way around. Right now she was in a fragile state, not feeling safe and it was his job to make her feel safe. That was all he should think about right now.

"Okay you have to guide me from here on," he said as they drove of the Williamsburg bridge. Amanda raised her hand and pointed ahead to the left. She gave him two street names and he followed her directions down the two streets.  
"And then it's at the end of this street," she pointed and he made a left turn after the opposing car had passed them. He was looking around at the houses. He remember her asking for some advice when she was about to buy the flat. She'd just been in town for a couple of months and she wasn't sure about the reputation of the borough. His mind was occupied with memories of their conversations back then when he was startled by a strong reaction of hers.

"Keep driving," she said quickly as she hunched down the seat suddenly not remembering the windows were tinted. Nick immediately looked further down the street and saw only one male figure by a door to the right side of the street. He kept the speed the same and as he passed the figure even Nick recognized Shane and realized that had to be her front door. Shane seemed to just stand there with his palms against the door, not even turning his head as they drove past. They reached the end of the street and Nick took a right. He drove in to the curb and shut the engine off.

"Is there another way in?" he asked as he turned to her. She shook her head as she sat back up in the seat. She kept staring ahead but her eyes seemed unfocused.  
"There's a garage. But the chip to the gate is in my car," she said quietly with a hint of disappointment in her voice. He looked ahead as he tried to gather his thoughts.  
"You can stay at my place," he said as he turned back to her. Her eyes shifted briefly sideways to meet his, her face had a big warning sign over it.  
"I mean Zara's room, the couch..." he didn't know how to continue.  
"Thank you but," she didn't know how to continue either and the car fell silent as she looked away again.  
"You know what. No. He doesn't have the right to prevent you from entering your own home," he decided and looked at her seriously. She looked back at him with an iffy expression on her face this time around.  
"We're going in there okay. Together. I'll make sure he doesn't come close to you. Okay?" She still looked hesitant.

"Together okay?" he repeated and finally got a nod. Not a stern and secure nod but still a nod so he got the keys out and stepped out onto the street. When he got up on the curb she'd just stepped outside. She looked anything but comfortable and it angered him that a person made the otherwise so sound and confident detective this way. Whatever he'd done to her it had to be bad but Nick couldn't speculate on that right now cause then his anger would take the better of him. He knew he had an anger problem he needed to keep under control. This was one of those times he needed to be levelheaded and he swore not to let her down. She held the box close to her chest as they started walking towards her street. She hesitated at the corner, took a deep breath and then got going again. Her front door was only two doors down so they knew Shane would probably spot them soon after they made that corner. Nick kept himself a step ahead of Amanda as they got closer. He focused his eyes on Shane who was now pounding at the door. Just as expected Shane spotted them approaching. Again a shade of anger flashed over his eyes as he spotted Nick by her side but then the hollow face came back. He stepped off the single step that led up to her front door and they noticed the slight fumble in his step as he turned towards them. Clearly drunk.

"Mandy," he said and looked at her with pleading eyes. He moved only a few steps towards them so they caught up to him not far from the door.  
"Please Mandy, let's just talk," he pleaded and tried to reach her but Nick put a palm in his chest and pushed him backwards so Amanda could get to the door.  
"Oh common man," Shane said as he briefly let his eyes off Amanda and on to Nick. The alcohol in his breath was evident and the southern drawl even wider it seemed. Nick had noticed that trait in Amanda too during one of the famous tequila races she often seemed to get caught up in with different detectives. She never backed out of a dare but she could hold her liquor, Nick knew that by now. Shane didn't seem to hold his liquor that good though. Nick just shook his head at him.

"Mandy. Common girl. Talk to me," he begged as his eyes went back to her. Nick wanted to make sure Amanda hadn't changed her mind and threw a look over his shoulder at her. She was just a step behind, trying to get the key into the door with again trembling hands. The expression on her face spoke volumes and made it clear her mind had not changed. She was paler than he'd ever seen her, eyes wide and wild and as mentioned hands now trembling again. Nicks rage grew in an instance and he grabbed a fist of Shane's sweater as he turned back to him. He pushed him a few steps backwards and stared the man down.  
"Look mister, I don't know you but I don't like you. You stay the hell away from her," his voice were filled with hatred but it didn't seem to register to Shane who kept looking beyond Nick.  
"Mandy I'm sorry okay," Shane slurred.

"Hey," Nick almost yelled and dug even deeper with his fist. Finally he seemed to get the man's' attention.  
"Hear me. Get the fuck away from here. I have a gun and a badge and believe me I'll use them if you're still out here when I get back down. Drunk and disorderly, you'll see the inside of the NY lockup and I'll make sure they lose the key for a at least a couple of days," he wasn't lying. He seemed to have finally gotten through to the man, through layers of booze and stupidity and he was finally quiet. Nick had heard the door open behind him and he quickly let go of the man's sweater and walked inside after Amanda. He made sure the door closed shut behind them and the last look he through Shane he saw him remain in the spot he'd been left in. Amanda had hurried to the elevator and waited in the open doors for him.

"Which floor?" he asked as he were the one that ended up closest to the buttons.  
"Third," even that short word came out sounding frail. He pushed the number three button and the car started moving as soon as the door had closed behind them.  
"You okay?" he asked and got a nod for an answer. He didn't buy it. They reached her floor and she stepped out ahead of him. He followed her down the corridor and gave her room as she stopped in front of a door to get it open. He wasn't sure if he should leave right away or if he should step inside for a while to make sure she was doing okay. She stepped inside and slid her boots of rather quickly. She then quickly moved inside and left the door wide open which he took as an invite. He stepped inside and closed the door behind him. He stepped out of his shoes and as he stepped into the room she'd made her way over to the window without turning the light on. Smart move cause Shane wouldn't know exactly which apartment she was in incase he was still out there. He watched her silhouette against the window. She was truly petite he thought.

"Is he still out there?" he asked and felt bad when he saw her twitch at the sound of his voice. He figured she might have forgotten he was there.  
"I don't know. Can only see like half the curb from here," she answered with her eyes still searching the street. She backed away from the window and as she got to the middle of the room she turned towards him. She was still clutching on to the package in her arms.  
"I need to use the bathroom," she said quickly and headed towards another door. She disappeared quickly. He soon heard yet another door open and close. He stood planted for a while, let his eyes go round the room. It was too dark to make out any colors of the place but it looked to be in the darker shades. The room looked cozy, like someone lived there and enjoyed doing so. A couch, a table, a rather big flat screen, a book shelf. He could imagine Amanda in this room. All snuggled up on the couch, feet on the table probably. He walked over to the window and had a look outside without moving the sheer curtains. He couldn't see Shane either but she was right about not seeing the entire curb. He turned around and had a look around the room from that angle. He listen for any sounds from the connecting room but when he heard nothing he started walking around carefully again. He found a stack of books by the couch and had a look at the titles. He saw authors like Dickens, Tolstoy and Twain. Books he'd heard of but never really read. He was somewhat surprised by the kind of books she seemed to read even though he'd never actually discussed literature with her so he had no way of knowing. He smiled as he saw Edgar Allan Poe's name in the stack, now that was an author he'd read. He saw a stack of Blue rays by the flat screen and walked over. He was expecting old classics but were in for a surprise. He found The Avengers, Wolverine and other superhero movies. She had good taste in movies he concluded. He smiled as he saw which disc was in the DVD. Kick-ass. He'd seen it and it wasn't bad actually. He found it truly fitting, on more than one occasion he'd heard Amanda being described as kick-ass. In his eyes it wasn't a bad thing to be called and it did suit her. He rose back up and his eyes searched the room for something. He didn't find it. No personal affects. No frames, photos, family heirlooms as far as he could see. The only thing on her wall except for a simple bookshelf were a painting. He couldn't tell what type of painting it was but it was of a simple farm house with a big field of crops behind it. The wind were blowing through the crops and the sky was clear. It was a peaceful painting to look at. He thought about having another look out the window when he heard something from the other room. His curiosity got the better of him as it usually did and he sneaked over to the door. He push the door open carefully and had a look inside. He spotted her before she him. She had crawled up on her bed, sat cross-legged with the now open box in front of her. She had removed her jacket and were dressed in only her jeans and her short sleeved white blouse. She was looking down at something square she was holding in her hands. Her hair was out now and framed her face beautifully as the lights from the outside fell over her frame. He knocked carefully on the door.

"Can I come in?" he asked as she looked up at him. He saw her nod and made his way inside. It felt a bit forbidden for some reason, being in her bedroom, but he still walked up to her. As he reached the bed she handed him the frame she was holding on to and he received it from her. He noticed the hair around her face was damp as though she had washed her face. She looked a bit more refreshed than when he last saw her. He watched her reach down into the box and pick up another frame. He finally looked down at the one he was given. Two young blond girls peeked back up at him and he immediately recognized Amanda even though she couldn't be more than about ten years old at the photo. The same smile, same curious blue eyes and same wild blond hair. She was climbed up on a fence in front of a farm, crops in the background. Looked almost as she was placed in the painting he'd seen in her living room if it weren't for the different colors on the actual farmhouse. She wore jeans shorts and a white tee with a washed out peace sign on it. Sneakers on her feet. He reckon it was her sister Kim on the fence beside her. He wasn't sure how old Kim were, had only seen her passing by outside the station with Amanda a few weeks ago. Liv had filled him in on some trouble the sister was in and Nick had just expected that the sister was much younger but at this photo they looked no more than two-three years apart. They both looked happy, with rosy cheeks and messed up dos.

"The package's from my mom," she said. He looked up from the photo and over to her. She kept her eyes on her photo though as she talked.  
"I didn't bring much when I transferred," she continued with some sadness to her voice. As she continued though her voice grew stronger: "My sister was here a few weeks ago and I reckon she told my mom about..."  
"The lack of photos," he filled in when she seemed lost for words and their eyes met briefly. She nodded with a hint of a smile on her face. He looked closer at his photo again.  
"You and your sister look awfully cute in this one," he said with a big smile. "Did you grew up on a farm?" He looked up when he heard her chuckle at his question. She had averted her eyes back down on her photo again.

"We could barely keep our apartment with my dad's gambling an all," she informed him with some spite to her voice. Nick didn't know how to respond to that. He knew about Amanda's gambling addiction and it didn't surprise him it ran in the family, addiction often did. He himself struggled with rage, the same kind he'd seen in his father's eyes whenever he'd bounced his mother around the walls. Amanda knew all too well addiction could run in the family. She had inherited her addiction from her dad even though she didn't think it could happen in a million years. Her dad had cause the family and her childhood so much strain she still had a hard time coming around the fact she'd slipped down that same road. But she still counted her blessings. Her sister had inherited both a week psyche and a drug habit from their mother. Though their mother didn't have a diagnosis Amanda was sure there was something going on there but their mother hid it well probably with the help of all those calming pills she popped every day. Kim got her diagnosis in her teens and the drug habit followed soon thereafter. Amanda would still pick gambling from the three choices even though it had almost cost her her job. She didn't want to dwell on it.

"My grandma grew up on a farm," she told him to get her mind on something happier. "She used to take me and Kim on long drives during the weekends, check out farms, pet animals, count cattle and stuff. We loved it," she looked up at him and handed him the frame she was holding on to. This one had an even younger Amanda all propped up on a couch with a newborn in her lap. The baby looked as it was fussing a bit and Amanda didn't seem all that pleased to be around it. She still tried a smile though and with two pigtails sticking out by both ears she looked adorable and Nick had to tell her.  
"Adorable," he smiled. Another chuckle came from her.  
"Try scared shitless," she said and continued: "Kim wailed her entire first year, not the kid sister I wanted."  
"Well you looked adorable even shitless," he said and looked up at her with a big smile. She'd pulled out a tee from the box and held it up in front of her.

"I should wear this to the next Mets game," she said as Nick read the text. Atlanta Braves. He shook his head at her.  
"No?" she smiled as she let the tee go and it fell down into her lap. They both looked down the box.  
"I ain't showing you that," she said as they both read North Atlanta High School on the yearbook cover.  
"Disappointed," Nick teased as he handed her back the two frames. With a smile on her face she put them down into the box again, placed the tee above and then reset the lid on the box. Her hand swiped over the box. She looked up at him briefly and then turned her head sideways. She took a breath and then used both her hands to swipe her hair behind her ears as she looked back down on the box. Nick watched her every move. The room had been silent for a while and it got a bit awkward. Nick decided to make it even more so.

"What did Shane want to talk to you about?" he asked and watched her reaction closely. She kept her eyes down but even if he'd been able to watch them the darkness would probably have prevented him from reading anything into them. Her posture became a bit rigid again though as he watched her shoulders tense up. He saw her finger swipe across the edge of the box. She stopped at the corner and started fidgeting on it.

"What is he sorry for?" Nick played his last card. Her hand disappeared behind the box again and several minutes passed by without anything happening. Nick started to feel like he'd overstayed his welcome. He didn't feel entitled to pry. He felt sorry that he hadn't earned her trust so she'd be able to open up to him. And he wondered if she'd open up if it had been Fin standing there right now. He felt inadequate, not a feeling he felt comfortable with. He swallowed as he came to a decision.

"I'll leave you alone," he said quietly but hadn't even turned completely when she made him turn back around.  
"Don't," she said and he quickly turned back. Her hand were extended towards him and left hanging in the air between them. He looked at it first and then further up to meet her eyes.  
"Stay," she whispered. She'd looked almost desperate but then her face suddenly seemed to go all shy. She made an embarrassed face as she shook her head and slowly retracted her hand down to the box.

"Oh man that sounded... bad," she said quietly. He couldn't help but smile as he could see, even in the dark, that her cheeks blushed. She had a tendency to not be able to hide it when she got embarrassed. She got the same shade on her cheeks as she got when she grew angry. He found it endearing.  
"I didn't mean for it to sound like... like I want you to sleep with me. Or I do. I mean I don't... not sleep sleep," she managed to tangle herself up even further and his smile expanded as did the blush on her cheeks. She looked up at him with a painfully embarrassed face but she seemed to relax quickly as he nodded at her as to explain he got it.  
"I don't want to be alone," she managed to say. He could tell it was hard for her to admit.  
"I get it. It's okay," he said to calm her even further.

"Sure?" she asked and he nodded. She took a deep breath as she too nodded. She crawled up backwards on the bed as he reached for the box to put it down by the bed. He felt far from limber as he put his knee up on the bed. Again he got the feeling he did something forbidden. He was climbing up onto her bed. His partners bed. Sure they were only going to sleep next to each other but the day had had him thinking more than some innocent thoughts and the excitement he felt right now didn't really feel completely righteous. She'd laid down on her side, facing him. They were both above the cover which felt a little bit more acceptable. Thankfully the bed were wide enough to leave some space between them as he laid down on his back. He adjusted his pillow and then himself until he found a spot that felt comfortable. His eyes wandered the ceiling for a bit as he listen to a car go by down on the street and watched its lights make small reflections on her ceiling. The hand closest to her were down on the bed and he felt the smooth material in the cover under his palm. The other hand were resting on his stomach. He took a deep breath and then turned his head towards her. He caught her looking at him before she hid behind her eyelids. He kept looking at her though. Her bottom hand had snuck underneath her pillow while the other one were making tiny circles on the sheet that was folded over the cover. Her hair had escaped from behind her ear and some strands had fallen down and forward over her neck. He couldn't hear her breathing but he saw her chest rise and fall calmly. Her eyes came back up and he focused on the white that were easier to spy in the dark. He smiled at her and she rewarded him with a tiny smile back. Her eyes stirred a bit, she felt a bit uncomfortable by his gaze. The situation she'd put them in were a bit awkward, she was aware of that but still thankful he was there by her side. He saw her swallow as though she was getting ready to do or say something. It took a while but then her hand slowly moved down towards his. He watched it for a bit but then returned to watch her face. Her eyes followed her hand down all the way though. When he felt her fingers reach his hand he turned it slowly around so she could sneak in her palm against his. Once her hand laid peacefully in his he dared to put his thumb down on top of it and he started rubbing it gently and soothing. Her skin felt smooth under his thumb. Her eyes had been fixed on their hands for a while when her whites appeared to him again. He saw her swallow hard again and he stopped the rubbing and waited for her next move. He really wasn't sure what was going on but he felt open for whatever. He saw her lips part. Her eyes disappeared as she bit down on her lower lip but soon their eyes had connected again. She let her lip go.

"He was my deputy chief back in Atlanta," she whispered and he held his breath. It would take awhile before she spoke again and he took only shallow breaths as he waited. Her eyes were hidden behind her eyelids.  
"He crossed a line one night," she whispered as she looked back up at him. He could tell her eyes were tearing up cause of the increase of glistening in them.  
"Part of the reason I had to get out of there," she whispered so quietly he barley heard her. He knew she wouldn't give him anymore when she smiled at him to cover up the teary eyes and embarrassment. But it was enough. He got it. Shane were one of the bad cops. One that probably used his power to get what he wanted. And he had wanted Amanda. Still wanted her Nick figured by what he'd seen tonight.

"Thank you for telling me," he whispered as he started rubbing her hand again. She swallowed hard as she tried to calm herself down again.  
"Thank you for staying," she finally managed to whisper.  
"Always," he whispered with a smile on his face. Her mouth turned slightly upwards. They laid completely still for several minutes connected by their hands and eyes. Then he saw her eyelids starting to flutter slightly. Soon they fell down only to race back up again. It happen two more times but on the third her eyes remained closed. Soon thereafter he felt her hand go completely relaxed in his hand. Her breathing became deeper and the sound soothed him. He kept her hand in his, kept moving his thumb over it. He fought the urge to reach out and caress away the strands of hair over her neck. Her deputy chief had crossed a line, he wouldn't do that. He knew he couldn't. It had clearly been hard for her just to ask him to stay, to share what she had just shared with him. He wouldn't violate the trust she'd shown him. He still didn't know what she'd been exposed to but he figured it was something severe. He based that on the state she'd been in ever since Shane first showed up at the station. He'd seen her chase down criminals on her own, bait herself, have a gun pointed at her head and never had he seen her show a single shred of vulnerability. But this man's presence had shook her up to the point she hadn't been functional. He had clearly hurt her in major way. He was probably the reason she thought so hard to hold her own, why the two of them butted heads so often. She was claiming her place, making sure no lines were crossed. And he would respect that. As he got sleepier though his thoughts got the better of him. He found himself admitting he wouldn't mind crossing a line with her as he laid there next to her in her bed. If she'd cross it with him of course. The barriers were coming down. His thoughts spun away from him. The last thing he saw before his own eyes fell shut were the curve of her upper lip. And the last thought was of how that lip would taste against his own. He fell asleep with a smile on his face.


	3. Epilogue

**The morning after**

She started to wake up as the sun hit her face. At first she couldn't figure out how she could have forgotten to close the blinds. She always closed them. She swallowed to get some moist back into her dry mouth. It felt like she hadn't brushed her teeth last night. How could she have forgotten that? She didn't feel like opening her eyes yet. She felt at ease, warm and protected. She stirred a bit and then suddenly just knew she wasn't alone. Her eyes jolted open and she immediately saw the arm that was resting over her. The hand resting on her bare lower arm started moving slightly. She relaxed quickly. She knew this hand. This arm. She knew who was sleeping behind her. Who's breath she could feel on the back of her neck. Who's leg she felt resting in-between hers. And it was okay. She felt perfectly safe. She remembered last night. She remembered all of yesterday. The good, the bad, the ugly. But for right now it felt okay. The sun fell over the bed. The sunrays that fell over her arm and now reached her face felt warm against her skin. She felt his hand move again. She looked at it as his fingers caressed her skin gently. She knew he was starting to wake up and this moment would soon end. She took a deep breath and tried to savor this moment.

He had always been a slow starter in the morning. He loved sleeping in. His wife had always been an early riser but thankfully his daughter loved to cozy up in the morning and stay in bed for just a little bit longer. He thought of her now. He missed her. His daughter, not so much his wife these days. It felt strange, there was a time when he thought he would die without her but life really did go on. He took a deep breath and an unfamiliar scent filled his sinus. He stirred a bit and felt the presence of another person next to him. Slowly last night came back to him. He kept his eyes closed. Wanted to stay in this moment for a little bit longer. He moved his fingers carefully, stroking her skin gently. Her skin felt soft and warm under his fingers. He took another breath, tried to identify the scent. Lily of the valley he guessed. He wondered if it was her shampoo, her conditioner or perhaps her lotion. Slowly he opened his eyes. Sunrays over her neck was the first thing he saw. Then the sun over her hair. Over her ear. The sheer white fabric over her shoulder. What a delightful sight to see first thing in the morning he thought. He had his arm over her. Their bodies had a little room between them but he felt his leg pushed in between hers. For a moment he felt like sliding in closer. Hold her tight for just a second. Feel what it felt like. If their bodies fitted together. He had a feeling they would. But of course he knew he shouldn't. That he couldn't. He felt her stir a little under his arm and he knew it was time to let go.

She knew he was awake. Felt the deep inhale. How his arm tensed just a bit, and then his leg. She tried to lay absolutely still. Appreciate the moment. She felt the next deep inhale. Wondered what he was doing. What he was thinking. The sun captured her entire face by now. She felt warm and safe. But she knew the moment had to end. She stirred a bit. Letting him think she was waking up. She closed her eyes. Took a deep breath and then slowly turned over on her back.

He watched her as she rolled backwards. Her jawbone, her curved lip, her closed eye, her nose and then her other eye as they were slowly opening. His arm landed on her chest. He felt her petite lumps underneath his forearm and he felt unwilling to move it. He met her sleepy blue eyes and a small smile spread over her lips. She took a deep breath, his arm pressing against her chest even more. He smiled back at her with his head still on the pillow. As she had turned over her shoulder landed against his chest, her side by his stomach. His leg preventing her from fully rolling over and making her hip rest against his. He watched as she turned her eyes up on the ceiling. Then she turned her eyes back down to meet his. Her smile turned charmingly shy and she started to move away from him. He got his eyes completely open and jolted backwards. He immediately missed the warm feeling of her body next to him. He rose up quickly, tried to plant himself on the floor securely. She'd gotten up on the other side. Folded her arms in front of her and grabbed a hold of her own elbows as she brought her shoulders up to her ears only to let them fall down again.

"I'm sorry about that," he gestured to the bed in-between them. "During the night I must have forgotten where..."  
"Don't worry about it," she interrupted him. She shook her head with a shy smile on her face. "I'm the one who asked you to sleep with me remember?" she said and looked down. He knew she was giving him a way out here and he appreciated it. He brought his hand up and rubbed his skull a bit. He spotted the box on the floor next to the bed. He remembered the photos of her. What she'd shared with him. Both the good and the bad.  
"Well I better be going then," he said and put his hands to his sides. Patted his pant legs a bit. She nodded. He hesitated though.

"Are you okay Amanda?" he asked and got her to look at him. She looked puzzled for a second but then nodded.  
"I mean not just with," he gestured to the bed and briefly his awkward smile came back but he focused and continued. "About what you told me last night and... Shane." She seemed uncomfortable with hearing Shane's name and Nick hoped he hadn't spoiled anything.  
"No lasting harm no foul right?" she tried to compose herself. Act a little bit more secure than she felt.  
"I don't know. You tell me?" he wasn't that satisfied with her answer. He watched her squirm a bit.  
"I'm okay Nick. Really. Thank you but I'll be fine," it sounded honest enough she thought. He watched her closely.  
"Well if you need anything. Ever. I hope you know you can call me?" She smiled and nodded.  
"Thanks," she said quietly.

Nick started moving towards the door but turned around as he reached it.  
"So I'll make sure he's not out there," he said. Amanda looked over at her alarm-clock. It was 8:30 am.  
"I think his plane has left by now actually," she told him.  
"Well I have a good look around anyway. And I'll pick you up before shift later today."  
"You don't have to Nick, I'll..."  
"Don't be silly Amanda. Your car is at the station. I'll text you when I'm getting closer," he waited for her to acknowledge and she gave him a nod.  
"Thanks Nick," she said.

"No problem," he was about to leave but turned around quickly and added: "And get those frames up on a wall. Nothing that cute should be hidden in a box," he smiled at her as he finally left the room. She felt some heat flare up on her cheeks. She shook her head and tried to contain her smile as she heard him leave. She felt conflicted. Too much emotions in less than 24 hours. She'd been all over the place. But she'd gotten through it. With a little help of a... friend. Yeah she felt like she'd gained a new friend. She felt the suns heat on her back. She turned around and took the few steps up to the window. She had a peek outside and caught Nick just as he stepped to the end of the curb.

She thought about hiding but stayed put. And then he looked up. First at her living room windows but then his eyes traveled to her window. He got a smile on his face when he saw her. He made an okay sign with his thumb and index finger and she raised her hand so he'd know she got it. He let go of his fingers and just held up his hand in the air for her as a goodbye. She raised her hand again and waved shortly. His hand slowly fell down and landed on his hip. He looked down the street and then back up at her. He had somewhat of a sheepish smile on his face she thought. She found herself unable to stop smiling and she wondered if she looked just as sheepish to him. He nodded just slightly and then pulled himself away, started to walk down the street. She followed him with her eyes as far as she could. She found herself leaning in so much her cheek touched the glass. She quickly stood up and brought up her hand to her mouth. She felt her own smile underneath her fingertips. She shook her head again.

"Get a grip Amanda," she whispered. But a grip was what she always had. She always felt like she had to be in control. Maybe losing her grip wasn't such a bad thing. Not with a friend at least. She needed to think about that. And there was something else she needed. She headed for the bathroom and a cold shower.

**The End! Well maybe not... ;)**


End file.
